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The night I composed this the intention was to post here; regrettably there was no connection. Here it is sans format:
What I Wish I Knew: When I Was In My Teens
FRIENDS
I wish I knew that friends I had in my teens might not be "forever" friends… not even some of my then-best friends. People change, priorities change, the world is a very much larger place than high school, and then… life goes on and we grow. I also wish I knew that friends would be so important in life; and that enduring friendships (like any important relationships) require effort, constant maintenance, lest they wilt from inattention. Nobody is entitled to good friends; everyone has to work at it.
SPIRITUALITY
For many (most?) folks spirituality means religion; and if that's what works for you then God[dess] Bless. But spirituality also means a feeling of connectedness to something larger than oneself: a club, a movement, an ideology… (such as folks that wave to the driver that let you merge in front of them)… I wish I knew that spirituality was not necessarily mystical; and was a feeling that could not be idly found. For example: Feeling "connected" to someone because they have a twit feed or a MyFace page is not spirituality… that's laziness.
MONEY
I wish I knew that money was not just a means to acquire things… that there is absolutely nothing wrong with saving and investing money instead of spending it. And if as a teen I had developed a sense that there are some things more important than "things"… I'd be in far better shape today.
ADVICE
Oh, advice really sucked as a teen; I was growing into an adult and felt that I knew everything I needed to know… and could figure out the rest. Even heartfelt advice seemed like criticism to me: "Advice unasked for is seldom appreciated". I wish I knew that at least some of that advice was very valuable and would have helped me avoid some of the stupider learning experiences. True, the whole "don't hang your arm out the car window or a truck will come by and take it off" stuff was safely ignored… but I ate the windshield several times before I realized that "wear your seatbelt" was actually very good advice.
SEX
I wish I knew that being interested in sexual stuff did not necessarily mean that I was a sinful perverted beast who would burn in hell forever. I also wish I knew that it was relatively safe to talk about this… (see "advice" above)… just not with everyone on planet.
FUTURE
When I was 13yo I could barely wait until Christmas… everything was so "real" and "now"… planning months (much less years) ahead was beyond my understanding. I was driving my own car by 17yo and nothing was more important than that. I wish I knew that it was important to have fun and enjoy my teens… and to grow and explore… but not so important to always have "satisfaction now". It would take me many years to figure that out.
Next:
What I Wish I Knew: When I Was In My Twenties
What I Wish I Knew: When I Was In My Teens
FRIENDS
I wish I knew that friends I had in my teens might not be "forever" friends… not even some of my then-best friends. People change, priorities change, the world is a very much larger place than high school, and then… life goes on and we grow. I also wish I knew that friends would be so important in life; and that enduring friendships (like any important relationships) require effort, constant maintenance, lest they wilt from inattention. Nobody is entitled to good friends; everyone has to work at it.
SPIRITUALITY
For many (most?) folks spirituality means religion; and if that's what works for you then God[dess] Bless. But spirituality also means a feeling of connectedness to something larger than oneself: a club, a movement, an ideology… (such as folks that wave to the driver that let you merge in front of them)… I wish I knew that spirituality was not necessarily mystical; and was a feeling that could not be idly found. For example: Feeling "connected" to someone because they have a twit feed or a MyFace page is not spirituality… that's laziness.
MONEY
I wish I knew that money was not just a means to acquire things… that there is absolutely nothing wrong with saving and investing money instead of spending it. And if as a teen I had developed a sense that there are some things more important than "things"… I'd be in far better shape today.
ADVICE
Oh, advice really sucked as a teen; I was growing into an adult and felt that I knew everything I needed to know… and could figure out the rest. Even heartfelt advice seemed like criticism to me: "Advice unasked for is seldom appreciated". I wish I knew that at least some of that advice was very valuable and would have helped me avoid some of the stupider learning experiences. True, the whole "don't hang your arm out the car window or a truck will come by and take it off" stuff was safely ignored… but I ate the windshield several times before I realized that "wear your seatbelt" was actually very good advice.
SEX
I wish I knew that being interested in sexual stuff did not necessarily mean that I was a sinful perverted beast who would burn in hell forever. I also wish I knew that it was relatively safe to talk about this… (see "advice" above)… just not with everyone on planet.
FUTURE
When I was 13yo I could barely wait until Christmas… everything was so "real" and "now"… planning months (much less years) ahead was beyond my understanding. I was driving my own car by 17yo and nothing was more important than that. I wish I knew that it was important to have fun and enjoy my teens… and to grow and explore… but not so important to always have "satisfaction now". It would take me many years to figure that out.
Next:
What I Wish I Knew: When I Was In My Twenties
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Add in the 24 year Active Duty Navy career immediately upon graduation from High School, and I can honestly count the number of people I encountered and consider life long friends on one hand. And only one of them am I in any kind of regular contact with.
Not an endorsement of the life, but the reality of having grown up in an environment where people came and went much more often then in 'normal'.
I have "discovered" that one consequence of growing up with that kind of stand off friend mindset is a dearth of friends later in life.
Not really an issue that concerns me on a day-to-day basis, but it certainly can be a problem if/when one finds that a friend or two would be a source of relief from daily life.
Spirituality. Now there is an area that you and I seem to agree upon. "a feeling of connectedness to something larger then oneself." Pretty good, IMO, description of something that most all human beings need. Even if many do not seek out a "Religious" connection, there are damn few who choose a hermit life, devoid of connections with much of anything, or anyone, beyond those few who might be vital to basic survival.
Money. "And if as a teen I had developed a sense that there are some things more important than "things"… I'd be in far better shape today." Wouldn't we all?
Advice. Sex. The Future.
I must say that I don't find any particular ideas to disagree with, which is kind of odd, as I generally find that there are few people on this Earth that can express a 'Philosophy', and not provoke a disagreement with me!
Guess that goes to show that, on many levels, people see things more or less the same way as life experiences shape their view.