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#1 User is offline   MTP Reggie 

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Posted 08 November 2019 - 07:35 AM

Playing Christmas Music Before Thanksgiving Now A Federal Crime
November 7th, 2017
Babylon Bee

<More Wishful Thinking Here>

U.S.—It’s easy to focus on everything going wrong with our country, so much so that we often don’t stop to take a minute and be thankful for the good things our leaders accomplish from time to time.

Take the most recent legislation passed by Congress, for instance: as of Tuesday, it is now a federal crime to play Christmas music before Thanksgiving.

Any storefront, home, or radio station playing songs like “Baby It’s Cold Outside,” “Rockin Around the Christmas Tree,” or “Last Christmas” is subject to immediate search by federal authorities, who have been instructed to arrest the perpetrator onsite and bring him or her to a secret CIA facility for questioning. Upon conviction, the suspect is subject to up to 20 years in federal prison.

The move passed the House with a historic unanimous vote of 435-0, skated through the Senate with another unprecedented vote of 100-0, and finally was signed into law in the very same day by President Trump.

“At long last, we can all unite around our hatred for being forced to listen to sappy Christmas standards months before December 25,” a Congressional representative said. “While we may all disagree on just about every other social issue of our day, at least we can come together on this.”

(snip)

<More Wishful Thinking Here>
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#2 User is offline   MontyPython 

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Posted 08 November 2019 - 08:10 AM

:lol:

(But hey, in real life - At least this year they waited until after Halloween, a pleasant surprise.)

B)
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#3 User is offline   zurg 

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Posted 08 November 2019 - 09:05 PM

I just went to a bar that had live music (good stuff too) and they played a couple of Christmas-y pieces.

Is it thanksgiving yet?
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#4 User is offline   Howsithangin 

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Posted 09 November 2019 - 01:44 AM

An actual line item in the democratic national platform, I believe
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