If Green Bay Packers Rule was the Prez

If Green Bay Packers Rule was the Prez Let the party begin Rate Topic:

#1 SAA

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Posted 30 April 2004 - 05:09 PM

IF GREEN BAY PACKERS RULE WAS THE PREZ

I would beam France, the UN, Barbara Streisand, Lurch Kerry, Ted "happy hour" Kennedy, Hillary Clinton, Madonna, Jesse Jackson, Alec Baldwin, Shaquille O'Neal, and Dan Rather to Mars.

I would have a constitutional amendment that would require every male to have a lifetime supply of beer, pizza, hot wings, High definition TV's playing football 24/7, Maxim magazine, and massage therapy from Salma Hayak, Jill Hennesy, and Catherine Zeta Jones.

I would require the Houston Astros to receive hypnosis during the playoffs in the hopes that the therapy would help them reacquire the ability to hit a baseball and finally win a playoff series.

Rightnation.us would become a weekly TV talk show with Mark as host, me as sports commentator, TheSickness as Mark's bodyguard, Tikk and Nuke as stand up comics, Lisa as fashion & beauty co-host, and Trek Queen as sci fi host

I would make it illegal for the media (print or tv) to show one more story about Jacko, Scott Peterson, Bobby Brown, Diana Ross, Courtney Love, Robert Blake, and Kobe Bryant.

Boy Bands would be legally banned.

Brett Favre would be awarded the title of "Sir".

Internet spammers/virus creators would receive 20 lashings with a bamboo stick and then thrown into the wood chipper.

Corporate crooks would be thrown in the county joint instead of federal prison. KY Jelly, though, would be provided.

Dudes wearing baggy elephant pants with boxer shorts sticking out, dudes wearing ski caps anywhere other than while skiing, dudes talking on their cell phones in elevators or in a public restroom, and dudes who put loud high performance mufflers on small sh!tty azz cars or who buy rims/tires that are worth more than the car would ALL be thrown into the wood chipper.

Science will develop a cure for cancer, the cold, AIDS, baldness, heart disease, and will develop a pill that will make men "endowed" like Peter North with 24 hour stamina.

A new remote control will be developed for men that will have buttons that provide instant "Sex", "Sports", "Booze", "Food".

This post has been edited by Green Bay Packers Rule: 03 May 2004 - 11:27 AM

#2

Group: Guests

Posted 01 May 2004 - 10:13 AM

Green Bay Packers Rule, on Apr 30 2004, 04:09 PM, said:

IF GREEN BAY PACKERS RULE WAS THE PREZ

I would make beam France, the UN, Barbara Streisand, Lurch Kerry, Ted "happy hour" Kennedy, Hillary Clinton, Madonna, Jesse Jackson, Alec Baldwin, Shaquille O'Neal, and Dan Rather to Mars.

I would have a constitutional amendment that would require every male to have a lifetime supply of beer, pizza, hot wings, High definition TV's playing football 24/7, Maxim magazine, and massage therapy from Salma Hayak, Jill Hennesy, and Catherine Zeta Jones.

I would require the Houston Astros to receive hypnosis during the playoffs in the hopes that the therapy would help them reacquire the ability to hit a baseball and finally win a playoff series.

Rightnation.us would become a weekly TV talk show with Mark as host, me as sports commentator, TheSickness as Mark's bodyguard, Tikk and Nuke as stand up comics, Lisa as fashion & beauty co-host, and Trek Queen as sci fi host

I would make it illegal for the media (print or tv) to show one more story about Jacko, Scott Peterson, Bobby Brown, Diana Ross, Courtney Love, Robert Blake, and Kobe Bryant.

Boy Bands would be legally banned.

Brett Favre would be awarded the title of "Sir".

Internet spammers/virus creators would receive 20 lashings with a bamboo stick and then thrown into the wood chipper.

Corporate crooks would be thrown in the county joint instead of federal prison. KY Jelly, though, would be provided.

Dudes wearing baggy elephant pants with boxer shorts sticking out, dudes wearing ski caps anywhere other than while skiing, dudes talking on their cell phones in elevators or in a public restroom, and dudes who put loud high performance mufflers on small sh!tty azz cars or who buy rims/tires that are worth more than the car would ALL be thrown into the wood chipper.

Science will develop a cure for cancer, the cold, AIDS, baldness, heart disease, and will develop a pill that will make men "endowed" like Peter North with 24 hour stamina.

A new remote control will be developed for men that will have buttons that provide instant "Sex", "Sports", "Booze", "Food".

Haha! I likes! Especially the banning of boy bands.
And I think I'd do a damn good job as Mark's bodyguard. Do I get my own "9" supplied for me, or do I have to use my own?

#3 Danger Mouse

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Posted 01 May 2004 - 07:13 PM

Green Bay Packers Rule, on Apr 30 2004, 06:09 PM, said:

GBPR in '08!

#4 Ptarmigan

expired - inactive for almost 1 year

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Posted 01 May 2004 - 07:53 PM

Nice

#5 SAA

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Group: 500+ Posts NonDonor
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Posted 03 May 2004 - 11:36 AM

ThaSickness, on May 1 2004, 09:13 AM, said:

Do I get my own "9" supplied for me, or do I have to use my own? :lol:

Sh!t,

Hell yeah I'll provide you with a "9". I'll even provide you with that gun that Jesse Ventura used in Predator. That should be enough to protect me from the scum of the earth.

dangermouse, I'll humbly accept your nomination.

One correction: instead of a new remote with "booze", "food", "sports", and "sex" buttons on it, I'll develop a "clapper" that will provide these services by vocal command.